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January 2019

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God. Recently, I don't know what it is, but I'm losing my grip on everything. The world is speeding past me, and I feel like I'm hopelissly trapped, watching everything move.
I keep having thoughts on my past for no reason. Not necessarly people, but events, with everyone else wipes out.

Now, these thoghts are making me distance myself from people. I don't know why, but I feel like everyone is closing in around me. I'm not sure I want to move away from everyone, and I'm not sure I will. Actually I highly doubt I will. But, right now, I am definatly going to be off kilter. I'll say right now that I'll try to hide it, but if you notice anything, ignore it. I'll eventually get my feet back on the blood drenched ground.

Anyway, onto a better subject. Hot guys.

Ok. Last friday, I was talking to Jenn, and she mentions that Elijah Wood is hot. My response suddenly was that he was too young for me. Thinking back on it, I realize that's not completely true. Sean Biggerstaff is actually 2 years younger. Then, every other actor that I think is majorly hot is over 25. Well, actually, over 27. After Sean, Orlano's the yougest actor I lust after. He's freaking 13 years older than me. God. I have issues, but older men, and I mean men, are definatly more alluring than guys my age. Seriously. I really don't think I've ever had a serious crush on anyone my age till Jb.